You Get What You Get And Don’t Have a Fit

In our house, my kids can often be heard saying, “You get what you get and don’t have a fit.” My husband and I aren’t sure where this expression came from (school, most likely) but we kind of love the way they say it -- a lighthearted reminder to basically not be grumpy about what you “get” in any given situation.

 

The other day, in one of my other roles working with HandsOnRVA on a an innovative service-learning initiative with Capital One executives, I had the good fortune of sitting in on an informal lecture about the issues surrounding workforce development, including the basics of what people need in order to succeed. So much of what lecturer Jamison Manion had to say was like hearing my self coaching or teaching yoga but in an entirely different framework…{insert my favorite catchall phrase right here: truth is one, paths are many}.

 

One of the things that he said that struck me the most was, “Every system is designed perfectly to get the results you get.” Or, if I were to adapt it a bit: you get what you get {because your system was perfectly designed to get it} so don’t have a fit {just see what needs to be changed in the system}.

 

So tell me:

·      What’s your system (related to self-care, relationships, well-being, work, exercise, family, health, you name it!)? If you think you don’t have one, you do: the lack of a system is a system in and of itself.

·      Are you getting the results you want? If yes, great! Stay attentive to the system incase you begin to get creaky parts or breakdowns in unexpected places.

·      If not, are you having a fit?  (Keep in mind here that what my children’s “fits” look like on the outside are more likely (though not always) reflected as internal behavior in adults – think of what all of these look and feel like on the inside pouting, feet-stomping, giving up, throwing in the towel, blaming self/others/situations).

·      Can you take a closer look at the system that you’ve created that is getting the results you’re getting, perfectly? Really break it down, see all the parts, analyze, hypothesize, get curious, see nothing as non-negotiable.

·      Maybe start with the results that you are hoping for and work backwards to see if each element of your system is actually doing what it’s intended -- getting you where you’re hoping to be?

 

You get what you get {because your system was perfectly designed to get it} so don’t have a fit {just see what needs to be changed in the system}.